Annie Saunders.

c'est la vie

nobody@vox.com(Not Annie Saunders) — Wed, 20 Aug 2008 16:21:27 -0700

i am putting so much more effort into this relationship than you are! you can't just effortlessly maintain a healthy relationship. you think you can, and that's the reason i have to work twice as hard. i have to constantly take your feelings into consideration with no concern for myself, because i'm not really a priority in my life.

whose life am i a priority in?

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hey.

nobody@vox.com(Not Annie Saunders) — Mon, 18 Aug 2008 11:24:18 -0700

i don't want to be friends with you anymore.

how could you possibly not care that i'm going to paris? jesus christ i'm so upset.

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upset.

nobody@vox.com(Not Annie Saunders) — Wed, 13 Aug 2008 15:52:02 -0700

oh, secret journal. i have a few things to tell you.
rather than addressing this to my journal, i should be addressing it to a future self. all i do is look back on old journal entries and wonder what i was thinking. so hey, annie, this is what you were thinking:
right now, i just want things to be completely different. i don't know how i got stuck in a rut, i never thought this could happen. but i really just want to hole up and never speak to anyone ever again! no one ever understands me, and i don't want anyone to have to. chris already understands me, why would i make anyone else do that? i'm going to save up a bit of money, like a few thousand dollars, and put in for a transfer to paris. i will live in squalor, but i don't care. i'd rather be poor in paris surrounded by strangers than comfortable over here with my friends. if i don't get the transfer, everything proceeds as normal. but if i get this, i will be able to sell my car for about 10,000 and run over there. i'm putting in for the transfer in october.
no one knows. i need this.i need to leave more than i need anyone here, or anyone here needs me.
paris, here i come (maybe).

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esmerelda's prophecy.

nobody@vox.com(Not Annie Saunders) — Sat, 09 Aug 2008 19:28:49 -0700

"You have had a lot of trouble, for which others are largely responsible, but you are now reaching a point when you will be able by your own efforts, to control your own affairs. You are not easily understood, as you keep much to yourself. You are fond of fine arts and like to be alone a great deal. You sometimes have a desire to destroy things, especially in your young days, for which you are sorry afterward. Be careful when the figure 7 appears on any money transaction, and keep your eyes open to some of your "would-be" friends.
One of your lucky numbers is 7
Drop another coin in the slot and I will tell you more."

I'm thinking about getting it framed.

Everything smells like vinegar to me lately. I miss having a home. What am I going to do for the rest of my life.

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driving

nobody@vox.com(Not Annie Saunders) — Wed, 23 Jul 2008 13:16:14 -0700

last night when i was driving home from work on the freeway, i looked into my rear-view mirror instead of my windshield and pretended i was driving into oncoming traffic.

how dangerous. i should look out of my windshield.

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